merry christmas

the recent events that have taken place this holiday season has allowed me to better understand the true meaning behind the christmas spirit. beyond the aspect of giving and receiving presents, eating lots of good food, or seeing friends and family its all about embracing the passion behind each of these gifts. much like the christmas story, its one thing to acknowledge that Christ was born but its another thing to embrace that gift. the art of embracing takes the idea of materialism and kicks it to the curb because whether who have one or one hundred presents if you embrace these gifts and give thanks with a grateful heart you will yield the same amount of joy. so whatever it is this christmas holiday truly embrace these gifts with a cheerful heart.

just being me.

sometimes i forget to think. then i do, and its too late.

i was just thinking.

I truthfully have nothing to say. Life right now is just...going...it's not bad just mundane. Expectations are null. Generally speaking the times are flat and I've got nothing which I guess isn't that bad. I feel like there is something more to this though, a bigger picture, a meaningful gesture to life. Maybe I've just totally missed it or maybe I'm encapsulated in this moment that is far more grand than my perceptions can comprehend. Merely thinking, I wish life wasn't like a still photo right now, but I'm just thinking, that's my problem. I sometimes forget to let go and just float, probably because I've been closing my mind and not my eyes. I feel as if freedom is some how being withheld from me, captive by my mind, not my heart. I wish it were the other way around. These times are always the hardest for me, things will get better, they always do.

so....

and the truth is.....

i look everywhere for it.

i can never find it.

i want to go far from here.

unfortunately its somewhere between here and there.

its the only place i ever want to be.

its never here.

about me...

Understanding that the needs of others is more important than our own self- interest, I believe is the beginning to living the lifestyle intended for our creation. Giving up our small ambitions refocuses our mindset from an earthly to an eternal perspective. Thus, having an eternal perspective allows us to walk in freedom to love and experience life abundantly that was promised to us. To live any differently would be to deny ourselves from experiencing the ultimate experience. This could possible make no sense what so ever but I gave it a shot anyways. Here are some good quotes to live by.

"I would rather die now, than live a life of obvious ease in such a civil world."

" What we need in this day and time is a much needed note of realism against the chorus of flatulent self-congratulation by the mediocrities who currently lead our society."

A fistful of paradoxes

I've come to a place in life where I've found that essentially everything I have known or currently know is counterproductive in my search for Jesus. Being brought up in the church I've come to know a serene, non-abrasive Jesus, Who is out there winning the battles for me without me ever having to go into the trenches. I've been told that with Him on my side that nothing could ever go wrong, but if it does it must be something I've done. However, the truth is, when does Jesus ever promise me job security, lots of money, happy-go-lucky life, and I think the answer is never. Forgive my pestimistic rhetoric if you will and look beyond what I'm saying. Jesus invaded this earth on a mission to radically create a movement unlike anyone has ever seen before. Even His disiples continually doubted His actions and statements. These teachings they were hearing were absolutely unheard of yet so tanglible and true that whether they didn't fully understand it they were still drawn to them. The power and passion injected throughout the teachings were so personable and heart-piercing it disturbed the leaders of the church, the pharasees, whom Jesus constantly rhetorically fought a constant basis throughout the Gospel. The reality of Jesus becomes Truth in my life when I daily surrender myself to Jesus and jump down into the trenches begin fighting for His kingdom instead of standing alone on the battle field as an open target for the enemy. I'm tired of lying to myself and denying who I was created to be. I want the radical Jesus, simply, but wholly.

Joy of Humility

On my face is where we meet.